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Name: The Dance of Deception: A Guide to Authenticity and Truth-Telling in Women's Relationships : Lerner PhD, PH D Harriet: Amazon.com.au: Books
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Rating: 4.5 (82 reviews)

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The Dance of Deception: A Guide to Authenticity and Truth-Telling in Women's Relationships Paperback – 28 March 1997

by PH D Harriet Lerner PhD (Author)

4.5 82 ratings

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When The Dance of Deceptionwas published, Lerner discovered that women were not eager to identify with the subject. "Well, I don't do deception" was a common resonse.

We all "do deception", often with the intention to protect ourselves and the relationships we depend on. The Dance of Deceptionunravels the ways (and whys) that women show the false and hide the real -- even to our own selves. We see how relationships are affected by lying and faking, by silence and pretending and by brave -- but misguided -- efforts to tell the truth.

Truth-telling is at the heart of what is most central in women's lives. It is at the foundation of authenticity and creativity, intimacy and joy. Yet in the name of "honesty", we can bludgeon each other. We can approach a difficult issue with such a poor sense of timing and tact that we can actually shut down the lines of communication rather than widening the path of truth-telling.

Sometimes Lerner's advice takes a surprising turn -- for example, when she asks us to engage in a bold act of pretending in order to discover something "more real"; or when she tells us not to parachute down on our family to bring up a "hot issue" without laying the necessary groundwork first.

Whether the subject is affairs, family secrets, sexual faking or the challenge of "being oneself", Lerner helps us to discover, speak and live our own truths.

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Print length

272 pages
Language

English
Publication date

28 March 1997
Dimensions

13.49 x 1.73 x 20.32 cm
ISBN-10

0060924632
ISBN-13

978-0060924638
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Review

"Stunning in it's impact. This is a book to be read and reread." -- Betty Carter, M.S.W. Director Emerita, Family Institute of Westchester, New York.

"A remarkable, beautifully written book illuminating ways for women to find integrity, courage, and voice in a world that rewards female silence and pretense." -- Carol Tavris, Ph.D.

About the Author

Harriet Lerner, Ph.D., is one of our nation's most loved and respected relationship experts. Renowned for her work on the psychology of women and family relationships, she served as a staff psychologist at the Menninger Clinic for more than two decades. A distinguished lecturer, workshop leader, and psychotherapist, she is the author of The Dance of Anger and other bestselling books. She is also, with her sister, an award-winning children's book writer. She and her husband are therapists in Lawrence, Kansas, and have two sons.

Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ William Morrow & Company; Reprint edition (28 March 1997)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Paperback ‏ : ‎ 272 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0060924632
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0060924638
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 13.49 x 1.73 x 20.32 cm

Best Sellers Rank: 281,304 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- 157 in Behaviourism
- 273 in Psychology Reference (Books)
- 333 in Behavioural Psychology (Books)

Customer Reviews:
4.5 82 ratings

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Harriet Lerner

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Harriet Lerner, Ph.D., is one of our nation's most loved and respected relationship experts. Renowned for her work on the psychology of women and family relationships, she served as a staff psychologist at the Menninger Clinic for more than two decades. A distinguished lecturer, workshop leader, and psychotherapist, she is the author of The Dance of Anger and other bestselling books. She is also, with her sister, an award-winning children's book writer. She and her husband are therapists in Lawrence, Kansas, and have two sons.

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4.5 out of 5

82 global ratings

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Transformational

Reviewed in Canada on 1 December 2022

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I have read other books by the author and have found each one to be very helpful. They have given me a new perspective on relationships and my part in them.

Eleanor

Great purchase for a honest journey of self discovery.

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 31 January 2020

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Informative and helpful. Make you take a good look at yourself. Very helpful.

One person found this helpful

N. Walker

Arrived on time and new, as posted.

Reviewed in the United States on 26 November 2012

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The Dance of Deception: A Guide to Authenticity and Truth-Telling in ... arrived on time and new, as posted. At first I felt as though I was over hearing a private conversation between two women who were finally breaking the secret code that I (as a male) was not given as a young man. Discussing this between two men is not as useful as having more than one woman in on the discussion to lead you to an understanding of what all men fear, inadequacy in communication. After some time, we men, faced our inadequacies and embraced them. As our mutual friend, Clint, observed, "A Man's got to know his limitations!" :-) Take a jump off the deep end and read this, but don't forget your life jacket - an understanding lady.

7 people found this helpful

Kindle

Great teaching reads

Reviewed in the United States on 10 April 2022

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So knowledgeable you can learn so much plus her book dance of anger

One person found this helpful

Kelly_Bodycott

Good

Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 31 May 2021

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Excellent

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