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Lovingkindness: The Revolutionary Art of Happiness Paperback – September 3, 2002

by Sharon Salzberg (Author), Jon Kabat-Zinn (Foreword)
4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 1,335 ratings
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Throughout our lives we long to love ourselves more deeply and find a greater sense of connection with others. Our fear of intimacy—both with others and with ourselves—creates feelings of pain and longing. But these feelings can also awaken in us the desire for freedom and the willingness to take up the spiritual path.

In this inspiring book, Sharon Salzberg, one of America's leading spiritual teachers, shows us how the Buddhist path of lovingkindness can help us discover the radiant, joyful heart within each of us. This practice of lovingkindness is revolutionary because it has the power to radically change our lives, helping us cultivate true happiness in ourselves and genuine compassion for others. The Buddha described the nature of such a spiritual path as "the liberation of the heart, which is love." The author draws on simple Buddhist teachings, wisdom stories from various traditions, guided meditation practices, and her own experience from twenty-five years of practice and teaching to illustrate how each one of us can cultivate love, compassion, joy, and equanimity—the four "heavenly abodes" of traditional Buddhism.
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  1. Print length
    208 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publisher
    Shambhala
  4. Publication date
    September 3, 2002
  5. Dimensions
    5.92 x 0.54 x 8.99 inches
  6. ISBN-10
    157062903X
  7. ISBN-13
    978-1570629037
  8. See all details
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Editorial Reviews

Review

"Salzberg exposes the warm beating heart at the center of Buddhism."—New Age Journal



"Reading Salzberg's book produces the sense of having been gifted abundantly."—Sylvia Boorstein, Turning Wheel

"Sharon Salzberg's book illuminates the heart of lovingkindness like a lamp in the darkness, like the clearing of the fog, like a sunrise on a beautiful morning—it brings light so that all those with eyes may see."—Jack Kornfield, author of After the Ecstasy, the Laundry



"Lovingkindness is a profound exploration of the deepest meanings of love, empathy, and caring. It offers psychological insights of real spiritual value and practical utility."—Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence

About the Author

Sharon Salzberg is one of America's leading spiritual teachers and authors. A practitioner of Buddhist meditation for over thirty years, she is a co-founder of the Barre Center for Buddhist Studies and the Insight Meditation Society, and she directs meditation retreats throughout the United States and abroad.

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Shambhala; First Edition (September 3, 2002)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 208 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 157062903X
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1570629037
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 10 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.92 x 0.54 x 8.99 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 1,335 ratings

About the author

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Sharon Salzberg

Sharon Salzberg

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Sharon Salzberg is a meditation pioneer, world-renowned teacher, and New York Times bestselling author. She is one of the first to bring mindfulness and lovingkindness meditation to mainstream American culture over 45 years ago, inspiring generations of meditation teachers and wellness influencers. Sharon is co-founder of The Insight Meditation Society in Barre, MA, and the author of twelve books, including the New York Times bestseller, Real Happiness, now in its second edition, and her seminal work, Lovingkindness. Her forthcoming release, Real Life: The Journey from Isolation to Openness and Freedom, is set for release in April of 2023 from Flatiron Books. Her podcast, The Metta Hour, has amassed six million downloads and features interviews with thought leaders from the mindfulness movement and beyond. Learn more at www.sharonsalzberg.com

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4.7 out of 5 stars
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Notice all the loving inscription on the title page. How appropriate! Just loved it.
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Top reviews from the United States

Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars Beautiful book
Reviewed in the United States on January 23, 2024
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Beautiful book. A lovely read.
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beantown film fan
5.0 out of 5 stars Saved My Sanity and Soul
Reviewed in the United States on September 21, 2012
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After a terrible freak accident that left me with a near-death experience, four days in a coma, a week in intensive care, a month in a rehab hospital after that, and then five months' bed rest at home, punctuated only by five painful and grueling hours of physical therapy per day and two supervised walks, I was in a nasty state spiritually and psychologically. Some abusive treatment and also medical errors at the various hospitals where I was treated left me blasted, detached, tentative, nervous, and with the feeling that I no longer understood the world or what my place in it might be. Various helpful trauma therapies and psychological assistance left me feeling better, but still very unattached, confused, bamboozled, and out of sorts. What was this world I was living in? How would I understand myself as a permanently disabled person? Why was I so numb and baffled all the time?

After several months of advice and searching, someone suggested Metta meditation to help me reconnect to myself and the world, and to help me feel safer. They suggested I buy this book, because Metta classes are hard to find. Long story short, it worked. Even just using the instruction in this book, and even without an actual teacher to guide me, I was able to get a practice going that made me feel better almost immediately. Just two short Metta sessions per day based on Ms.Salzberg's instructions (which was all the time I could physically spend sitting), was enough to restore my sense of myself, make me feel much more attached to the world, and to feel powerful despite my disabilities. Once this practice let me reconnect with my naturally loving and optimistic spirit, it unfolded fairly quickly that I felt deeply soothed and more secure every minute of every day.

I cannot recommend this practice more highly, and if you don't have a Metta teacher available to you, this book is the best place to get started. If you suffer from some kind of trauma, sense of unreality or inability to connect with others and the world around you, or some kind of severe emotional pain, this is the way to go. I think that for ordinary life stresses or spiritual development, insight meditation or Zen or some other kind like that might be fine, but if something really nasty has happened to you, or if something really unpleasing happened to you in the past that's eroding your ability to live a normal, happy life, Metta meditation is the way to go. Thanks to its clear, simple explanations and easy-to-remember mantra, this book is the place to go when you need to be healed.

May you be happy
May you be peaceful
May you be free from fear and pain
May you live life with ease.....

May all beings be happy....
230 people found this helpful
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Emily
5.0 out of 5 stars Deep, timeless work
Reviewed in the United States on September 2, 2017
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Such a deep thoughtful book. This book is timeless and has so many golden insights that it filled up my Kindle highlights. I'd love to re-read it.

Favorite quotes:
Abandoning unskillful states that cause suffering is not something we do out of fear of or contempt for those states, or out of contempt for ourselves for having those states arise in the mind. Abandoning the unskillful isn’t accomplished by angrily shoving or pushing away our habits of separation. Rather it comes as we learn to truly love ourselves and all beings, so that love provides the light by which we bear witness to those burdens, watching them simply fall away.

We can travel a long way and do many different things, but our deepest happiness is not born from accumulating new experiences. It is born from letting go of what is unnecessary, and knowing ourselves to be always at home. True happiness may not be at all far away, but it requires a radical change of view as to where to find it.

There is a word in Buddhist psychology, tathata, that can be translated as “thusness” or “suchness.” It describes a state in which the totality of our being is present; our awareness is not fragmented or divided. In the state of suchness, some part of ourselves is not sitting elsewhere waiting for something better or different to happen. We are not relating to our experience with either desire or aversion, but rather we accept what comes into our lives and let go of what leaves our lives. We are completely present and not beguiled by the token happiness promised by conventional assumptions. In experiencing the freedom of suchness, we discover who we actually are.

The simple act of being completely present to another person is truly an act of love—no drama is required.

A friend may disappoint us; she may not meet our expectations, but we do not stop being a friend to her. We may in fact disappoint ourselves, may not meet our own expectations, but we do not cease to be a friend to ourselves.

As we lose touch with our inner life, we become dependent on the shifting winds of external change for a sense of who we are, what we care about, and what we value. The fear of pain that we tried to escape becomes, in fact, our constant companion.

We so often in our lives serve as mirrors for one another. We look to others to find out if we ourselves are lovable; we look to others to find out if we are capable of feeling love;

Imagine taking a very small glass of water and putting into it a teaspoon of salt. Because of the small size of the container, the teaspoon of salt is going to have a big impact upon the water. However, if you approach a much larger body of water, such as a lake, and put into it that same teaspoonful of salt, it will not have the same intensity of impact, because of the vastness and openness of the vessel receiving it. Even when the salt remains the same, the spaciousness of the vessel receiving it changes everything. We spend a lot of our lives looking for a feeling of safety or protection; we try to alter the amount of salt that comes our way. Ironically, the salt is the very thing that we cannot do anything about, as life changes and offers us repeated ups and downs. Our true work is to create a container so immense that any amount of salt, even a truckload, can come into it without affecting our capacity to receive it. No situation, even an extreme one, then can mandate a particular reaction.

Forgiveness allows us to recapture some part of ourselves that we left behind in bondage to a past event. Some part of our identity may also need to die in that letting go, so that we can reclaim the energy bound up in the past.
26 people found this helpful
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Kindle Customer
4.0 out of 5 stars Great Buddhist Teachings
Reviewed in the United States on August 21, 2022
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This book shows how wise Buddha was and his teachings are universal and timeless. The only thing I didn't agree with is when it says we should empathize with malicious criminals like murderers and rapists. Empathy is a great thing but within limits. Otherwise this is a great book with a powerful message.
14 people found this helpful
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Valley Lady
5.0 out of 5 stars Wonderful
Reviewed in the United States on March 8, 2024
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If you’re in the “practice” this is a must have
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pcpf
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent primer
Reviewed in the United States on October 2, 2017
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I started to strive for daily meditation about a year ago and it changed my life. Now I am interested in reading more about the subject but find that some of the books can be a little bit... how do I put it... boring. I mean it is hard to write about sitting still!

I read about "Loving kindness" on a blog post on the University of California' greater good in action website. The blog post was about how research showed that practicing loving-kindness meditation for seven consecutive days can increase positive feelings such as joy and referred this book.

It didnt disappoint. It is well-written, easy to follow and yet, I found that the author can also be poetic at times, and is even entertaining.

Each chapter includes a general explanation and at least a couple of practical exercises. For me, it was the perfect introduction to the practice.

The author also introduces the reader to various practicioners (masters etc) often by quoting them. I leave you with this gem:

"The Thai meditation master Ajahn Chah describes this happiness we can attain through meditation practice: 'Your mind will become still in all surroundings, like a clear forest pool. All kinds of wonderful rare animals will come to drink at the pool, and you will clearly see the nature of all things..."
76 people found this helpful
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Andrea Clifton
5.0 out of 5 stars excellant read
Reviewed in the United States on February 4, 2024
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easy breakdown of Buddhist philosophy
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Top reviews from other countries

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mike
5.0 out of 5 stars Recommend to deepen your compassion!
Reviewed in Canada on March 21, 2023
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Absolutely loved this book! It has helped me deepen my compassion towards myself and others, shifting all relationships in my life and easing the process through struggles and suffering. Life changing.
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RADHEY
5.0 out of 5 stars This is experiment manual for self love and self compassion.
Reviewed in India on December 30, 2023
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I learnt on YouTube that shame was a cry for love from others and acceptance from others and a proven cure has been developement of self compassion,asit has been proved and being researched by modern psychologist like Kristine Neff and James Garner so I bought Kristine Neff book and it is full of scientific details but then I realised that buddhist teacher must have written far better book on the same topic so I searched and found Slazberg's writing and she being an experienced meditator,teacher and practioner of buddhist meditation.I have no doubt in the methods she has pointed out,I am meditating with these inputs given by her.
I feel so greatful that people have already walked on difficult path and cleared so much of path for new layperson.
I have an ancient shame and bad self image of me so I am working with meditation suggested by Slazberg into my daily meditation practice.hopefully it will bear fruit in time for my overall spiritual growth.
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Femme
5.0 out of 5 stars Hermoso
Reviewed in Mexico on December 9, 2018
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Hermoso
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Elena Manrique
5.0 out of 5 stars Fascinante
Reviewed in Spain on May 12, 2019
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Muy interesante y muy practico
One person found this helpful
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Kamilla Naves
5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing book that provides guidance to all people in pursuit of happiness
Reviewed in Brazil on December 3, 2014
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By teaching you simple yet profound Buddhist thoughts, this book is going to change the way you see the world. It praises love and compassion for all beings, inspiring and motivating readers to take the lead in their own lives in a positive and optimistic manner.
2 people found this helpful
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